I am writing again. I am trying to do the November novel thing. I am not exactly writing a novel, it is more a semi-fictional account of how I am feeling about this Jason moving situation. So it is not completely untrue, however, I am not sure how accurate it is going to be, since I don't even know how that situation is going to turn out at this point.

I am starting to work on an outline and stuff now, so once November starts I will be able to dive in and write. I always have the best of intentions going into this, and then run out of things to say about 5 days in. And then I just give up. This year I am determined to get all the way through the 50,000 words or whatever it is, and have a real product to show for it.

Jason and I are getting together tonight. We are going to make tacos for dinner and just have a relaxing evening at home. I am trying to remain calm about what is coming on Friday, which has been really tough for me. I am obviously not all that calm about it considering I am going to be writing my first novel on the subject, as well as it is all I can talk about here lately. I am embarrassed about the "praying to God daily that he doesn't get it" thing. It is embarrassing and I am not sure how he will be if he doesn't get it. I have no idea what kind of toll that will take on his attitude.

I am trying not to worry too much about that yet. I mean, we don't know. We don't know. I have to keep repeating that to myself over and over and over. Not that the repetition is really helping me in any way, but I feel like maybe, just maybe, I will be able to convince myself of it sometime before Friday. However, I am still praying that he doesn't get it, because I am apparently terrible like that. I know, I know, I am beginning to get repetitious even in my writing. I hate that.

So I have yoga at lunch today. This is the 4th class we have had. I am really enjoying it, and it is really relaxing to me. It helps me to get through the afternoon on Wednesdays a lot more easily.

Work is good, busy, but good. I have a deadline this week, and another in a month. I worked late last night, which was really stressful, but hey, I gotta get it done, right?

The family is... dramatic, as always. I am just ready for that part of my life to calm down, so I don't have that extra thing on my brain bugging me all the time. I am not sure when (or even IF) that'll relax, but I am trying to take all of it in stride.

I was supposed to walk in the Making Strides against Breast Cancer walk this past Sunday, but because I was out of town, I did not. However, I feel like this isn't that big of a deal because they still got my money, right? And Kansas City was definitely the more interesting/fun and maybe even important (considering my relationship) decision.


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